Marcus Urban, Germany’s first openly gay player, claims 'gay players' are resorting to “fake girlfriends and fake marriages” to conceal their sexuality

Marcus Urban, Germany’s first male footballer to publicly come out as gay, has made striking claims about the hidden lives of LGBTQ+ players in Europe’s top football leagues. In a forthcoming book titled Mensch Fußballstar (Human Football Star), Urban reveals that many 'gay players' are resorting to “fake girlfriends and fake marriages” to conceal their sexuality - not because of public hostility, but due to internal pressures within the sport.

Urban, now 54 and a prominent LGBTQ+ advocate, says that while fans and media have become more accepting, the fear among players and their inner circles remains a major barrier. “It used to be said that the media and fans were to blame for no one coming out,” he explains. “I think today it's just the fears of the players and the people around them, at least where we are, in the heart of Europe”.

There are still too many people around them who advised [against coming out].

He claims that some agents and advisors actively discourage players from coming out, fearing it could affect their careers or public image. “There are still too many people around them who advised them against it - media lawyers, advisors, family - people who are basking in their money and fame and projecting their misguided pseudo-care and their own fears onto the players,” Urban said.

Urban also revealed that there are gay couples currently active in the Bundesliga and other top leagues, describing them as “very nice and very pretty.” However, these players remain closeted, often organising their personal lives to maintain a heterosexual public image. “Fake girlfriends are organised, fake marriages are arranged,” he said, adding that some agencies even profit from facilitating these arrangements.

In 2024, Urban and his organisation Diversero attempted to coordinate a collective coming out on May 17 — the International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia, Intersex and Transphobia. Despite initial interest, no players ultimately took part. Urban believes fear and lack of institutional support played a role in the decision. “The players are repeatedly thwarted in their desire for freedom,” he said.

Urban’s revelations highlight the ongoing challenges faced by LGBTQ+ athletes in men’s football, where homophobia and outdated norms still exert pressure. He hopes that visibility and solidarity will eventually lead to a more inclusive environment. “We want to achieve the same boredom [about sexuality] among men as in women’s football,” he said. “So that everyone can say: ‘This is my partner. This is our child.’”